I miss the way it smells, the way it sounds, the way it feels to walk outside in the morning and the sun is already beating down on you, it’s hot and it’s humid, and it isn’t even 8 am yet. I miss being undeniably good at something. Even if it’s something as simple as making a guest smile, I was good at my job. I miss feeling like I have no limits, even if I had to take the bus everywhere I wanted to go, the possibilities were endless and I always had an escape. I miss throwing a bunch of shit in a backpack, grabbing a park schedule, and disappearing for an entire day. I even miss the way it hurt to wake up in the morning and put my feet on the ground because they hurt for standing for 12 hours straight.
I miss the design on the Starbucks coffee cups and the way you would walk out of the shop and your cup would immediately begin to sweat in your hand because of the heat. I miss making $10/hr (really added up considering all of the hours, overtime, and holidays that I worked) but feeling like I was rich and treating myself every chance I got because I deserved it. I miss the people. I miss the way work didn’t feel like a chore. I miss the way chores didn’t feel like chores. I miss the way that living real life (paying bills, grocery shopping, keeping up the house, working full time) in Florida didn’t feel like real life, it felt more like a fantasy.
I miss the way I wasn’t afraid to live my life. I would stay out until midnight every night even knowing that I had to be up at 5:45 the next day for work. I miss the way I wasn’t afraid to live just because I had work the next day. I miss the way I took advantage of every opportunity because I knew that this life was only temporary and I had to get the most out of it that I could.
I need to go back to this attitude. This life that I’m living is where I’m at for the time being. I feel like I’m stuck in Cleveland for a while but the fact of the matter is, life in general is still temporary. I work 40 hours a week that is a lot of my life that is being taken away from me. It is absolutely ridiculous for me not to live what is left of the rest of my week to the fullest and do things for myself. Things that will make me a happier person. The opportunities for things to do in Cleveland are endless, I just need to start taking advantage of them.
I don’t miss Disney all the time, I definitely don’t miss working for Disney all the time, but there is not a day, week, month, or even a year that goes by that I don’t think about my Disney life or my life in Florida. I miss Florida life. I miss it all the time.